Bean came! And maybe I'll write about that sometime. Parts of it were scary, and I'm doing therapy about it. But they're here and we're thrilled and now, of course, 24 days into their life, I got COVID and I'm locked in my basement. I'm listening to the Calm Christmas Podcast and sneezing into my bedsheets (which are the guest room bedsheets). My partner is surprise solo parenting and they're doing an excellent job; I am doing an okay job at resting. I just want to surge up the stairs every time I hear Bean cry. (And why do I keep calling them Bean? Because I'm not putting their name or face on God's Public Internet, that's why). The Calm Christmas podcast has a journaling prompt and I usually journaled hardcopy, but this has felt easier since being pregnant. And maybe since being not-pregnant/a brand new parent, who knows what is going to feel easy and feel hard.
Anyhow, the journaling prompt is what kind of Christmas do I want this year? It's Bean's first and the only thing I've been doing while locked in my basement is our diaper laundry and also stitching our names on stockings my mother made and working on Christmas gifts. Making wrapping paper out of recycled packaging paper. My parents are coming all the way to Alberta from South Carolina (which is not easy). I think I just want cozy family time this year. This is probably colored by being separated from my partner and my baby right now (I hate this and I love them), but anything else pales in comparison to just having quiet time with them. And then I want to spoil A.J. as much as our budgets allow. We agreed on stocking-only Christmas. But plenty of cool stuff fits in a stocking.